‘Star Trek: Discovery’ is Shockingly Predictable with ‘The Wolf Inside’

This is a summary, rather than a full article, as there’s so much that I want to cover right now that if I were to fully explore my thoughts on ‘Discovery’ so far, I would be writing until I died from ice-cream-induced heart attack (so about three weeks).


  • Well, it turns out the real Klingon was inside of Ash all along.
  • Who.
  • Would.
  • Have.
  • Guessed.
  • Certainly not me.
  • Okay, maybe I guessed a little. I think my suspicions started when, at the end of Episode Four we saw L’Rell telling Voq that he was “about to go through some changes”, and in Episode Five we see L’Rell with some rando human sex slave on her prison ship. And then we didn’t see Voq for the entire rest of the series.
  • Still though, WHAT A TWIST.
  • For a “faceless” leader renowned for her anonymity, Emperor Georgiou really likes to micromanage.
  • But it is nice to see Michelle Yeoh back
  • Even if it’s not surprising.
  • “We still live and die by Federation law,” says Saru, in full knowledge of the fact that Lorca has been tortured for seventy-two hours straight whilst Burnham and Ash make bumpies with their pelvises and sleep in silk sheets.
  • And, they’re going to take Ash to a tribunal. Except he’s either A) Been brainwashed, so get him to a medical facility, or B) he’s literally a Klingon spy in disguise. Those are the only options, there is no “He suddenly decided to turn traitor on his shipmates, learn fluent Klingon and dedicate himself to a foreign religion in the space of a day” option.
  • I will concede, I was really, really glad to finally see Tilly being plot-relevant after a painfully long period of her barely counting as comic relief.
  • Sarek’s goatee was a cheap means of winning over the fans. It also totally worked, I loved it.
beardsarek
Your loins are no match for sexiness of this magnitude.
  • Burnham poses as the captain of the Shenzhou so she can get the files on the Defiant. Except that the files are encrypted. Even though she’s the highest-ranked officer on the ship. So if nobody is to read the files, why are they even on the ship? Or if the captain is meant to have access to them, why doesn’t she? If she can’t remember (never knew) any of the access codes, how would she even be able to do anything on the ship at all?
  • Burnham and Tyler intentionally beam down to the hostile planet five hundred metres away from the rebel stronghold. Into open terrain. And then act surprised when they get ambushed.
  • Probably the most boring “I-was-an-evil-agent-all-along” reveal scene I’ve ever witnessed. Just two people in a room, talking. So much of ‘Discovery’ features two (occasionally three) people just stood around talking about something that the audience hasn’t even seen. There are so many more interesting ways Tyler could have revealed himself to Burnham, instead he just monologues awkwardly at her for five minutes then tries to strangle her. Thrilling.
  • Apparently ‘The Expanse’ isn’t enough, they now also need to steal execution methods from ‘Battlestar Galactica’. (Okay, now I’m just whinging.)
  • No, wait, the whole Tyler arc is just Boomer’s from BSG. Jesus Christ.
  • HOLY CRAP, AND THE WHOLE POINT WAS THEM HAVING A PLAN WHEN THEY REALLY DIDN’T ALL ALONG. I mean, seriously, what exactly was Voq supposed to do? All he did was shag Burnham and be an incredibly suspicious liability. What the hell was the point of him turning into Tyler at all? Besides to have a “big surprising twist reveal”?
  • As outraged as I am, I am still happy to meme the shit out of it for internet points:
  • TYLON
  • The Andorians get yet another overhaul in aesthetic. As do the Tellarites. At this point, it’s only humans and pointy-eared humans who have not been hit with the update stick. But we can’t be more than one or two reboots away from seeing bumpy-headed Vulcans.
  • Seriously, three days. He was getting tortured for THREE. DAYS. Here’s what Burnham got up to during those three days:
    • Was bathed by an actual body slave.
    • Spectated on some good old fashioned capital punishment.
    • Shagged her boyfriend.
    • Slept.
    • Gave moody monologues.
    • Downloaded some data onto a USB stick.
  • Mirror Mind-Stamets appears. Because the one thing we need right now, between the Klingon spy, his imprisoned Klingon mate, the probable Mirror Lorca, Burnham meeting all her dead friends, and also some other bullshit, is yet another weird and metaphysical plot thread.
  • How come we still haven’t seen the tardigrade? Oh, right, he’s going to come back and Tardigrade Machina them back home, isn’t he?
  • Detmer and Burnham finally, finally, have an actual conversation. They talk about Burnham’s (presumably ex-) boyfriend. This is the eleventh episode in which these two bridge officers have both appeared in the same room.
  • There are still four more episodes. I’m not sure how well I will hold up.
  • Probably not well.

2 thoughts on “‘Star Trek: Discovery’ is Shockingly Predictable with ‘The Wolf Inside’

  1. It’s like the cover of Cosmo; Tilly can now pretty much do anything because she’s had a makeover – maybe use that sexy confidence to ask that male role for a recommendation, hun!
    Oh also, must mention the unnecessary shots of Burnham in lingerie.

    Liked by 1 person

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